"Making a Love Connection"

I just finished reading an interesting article for my class, it was about preventing teen pregnancies through relationship education. One statement from the article that I really liked was: "Talking to teens about sex without talking to them about relationships and love makes little sense." Parents need to be more involved in teaching their children about relationships, love, marriage, and sex. Yes it's kind of awkward and you might think "why bother, they can take Theme 5 (that's what it was called at my school)" but the article points out that by the time a person is a teenager they have already absorbed messages about sex from the streets and the media. The article gave examples of songs that have themes of abandonment, betrayal, sadness, anger, pain, and a longing for a functional family. I thought of another song not mentioned, it is called Father of Mine by Everclear. Here are the lyrics to the first verse:
"Father of Mine
Tell me where have you been
You know I just closed my eyes
My whole world disappeared
Father of Mine
Take me back to the day
When I was still your golden boy
Back before you went away"

Some teens only see failing relationships, therefore they are pessimistic about ever forming a successful relationship for themselves, if they see a happy marriage as being impossible they won't even bother with it and will try to fulfill their need for love and sex elsewhere (outside of marriage).

I think of some of my favorite shows, like Gilmore Girls, it's about a mother who got pregnant at 16. The article states that "for today's generation sex is increasingly separate from marriage and married parenthood. Sex is just sex." This is a sad reality. I've even noticed a theme in several of the classic Disney cartoons and Disney Pixar, there is so much single parenting going on, usually due to death, but still it sends the message to children that single parent homes are normal - The Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Pocahontas, Cinderella, Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Up, to name a few.

These are just a few points that I found interesting, I thought it was a very good article and hope to see relationship education programs become more common.

All You Need Is Love...?

~marriage rates are higher among the more educated & divorce rates are lower
~as an expecting or brand new mother it is important to include your husband as much as possible (bringing him along for doctor's appointments, letting him feel the baby kick, letting him help pick out clothes & accessories for the baby)
~husband and wife need strong bonds that don't involve the children because at some point you will be empty-nesters
~DO NOT complain to friends and family about your spouse
~crises/challenges are actually learning opportunities
~parents should also be mindful of the other children when a new baby arrives on the scene so that they don't feel neglected (for example when my nephew was born my niece got some Disney princess toys from her parents)
~in marriage you need to pick your battles, some things are worth fighting about, others really don't matter that much

He Will Give You Help

This is a Mormon Message about the youth in my hometown, the young man featured happens to be my youngest brother. I encourage everybody to watch this short video clip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDbMAeMdpB0

I know that Heavenly Father is aware of each of us, I know that he hears and answers prayers, in His own time and in His own ways. I know that the Savior willingly descended below all things and experienced the pain of all of my sins and trials before I did and that He is the one and only person who can truly say "I know how you feel". I know that if we come unto Christ and accept His Atonement into our lives He will help us through all of life's struggles. He wants to help us, He's waiting for us to turn to Him and ask for help. I know that Heavenly Father loves us so much that He sent His beloved Son to suffer in Gethsemane so that we could all return to live with Him again. I know that families are meant to be together for eternity.

Through the experience of almost losing my brother I've learned to appreciate my family more. I didn't used to tell my brothers I loved them very often, but now I take every opportunity to do so, because I would hate for one of us to leave this earth without them knowing that I love my family and that I know the gospel of Jesus Christ is true. I am more aware of how short and fragile life can be and I am trying harder to make the most of my mortal journey.

Update: Christopher Evanson has his mission call to California, and is waiting for his Visa. Darren Haslam entered the MTC on January 5, 2011 and is preparing to serve the Lord in the Mexico City East mission.

This is another Mormon Message shot in Alberta. It has to do with the relationship between mothers and daughters; it is definitely worth watching.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKpfE6qwGXI

Selecting a Life Partner

Chapter 7
Studies show that cohabitation before marriage does not yield the expected benefits, it is actually more likely to yield a poorer quality and less stable marriage. One of the most important factors that contributes to marital satisfaction is equity in home responsibilities. If one partner is doing all the work while the other sits on the couch reading a book or watching TV all the time, the working partner is not going to be happy with the marriage. I guess it's important to discuss expectations with your potential spouse before the wedding. Unfortunately, no matter how well we prepare for marriage, it is difficult to predict long-term marital satisfaction for a couple of reasons.
1. our knowledge of another person is always limited, we tend to put our best foot forward during courtship
2. everyone changes over time (needs & interests change) and these changes may make us more or less compatible with our chosen partner

Biological Differences

I thought that today's discussion was quite interesting. Why is it that little girls can play with trucks in the dirt and nobody worries but if little boys play with dolls everybody freaks out? I think that Bem's theory makes a lot of sense. Young people (actually people of all ages) are very sensitive to other people's opinions of them. So if a young man is constantly hearing people tell him he's gay it makes sense that he'll start to wonder about his sexuality and eventually believe it. The same principle can apply to academics or the story of Johnny Lingo. If a child is constantly told by his or her teachers, parents, and peers that he or she is stupid he or she will begin to believe it, this could cause them to not be able to concentrate on the material then they do poorly on an exam and that confirms it to the child, and it's just a vicious cycle. Mahana was told by her father and everybody in the village that she was ugly so she believed it so much that it reflected in her countenance. The way I see it is a lot of people end up considering themselves gay because of misunderstandings.

Gender Roles

Androgyny --> possession of both traditional masculine (instrumental) and traditional feminine (expressive) traits

I think that this picture of my nephew taking his bobcat for a walk is a perfect example of androgenous behavior.